Skip to main content

What to do after you get it wrong

Tawbah & Allah's mercy

Children need a truthful answer to one question: what happens after I do something wrong? Islam's answer is not shame — it is tawbah, turning back. These five lessons are built only on narrations we can point to: the hadith of the man who finds his lost camel, the hadith that the best of those who sin are those who repent, the hadith that Allah accepts repentance as long as the soul has not reached the throat, the Prophet's ﷺ own istighfar more than seventy times a day, and the hadith that Allah wrote above His Throne 'My Mercy preceded My Anger'. The ayah texts on these pages come straight from the verified Uthmani text.

A cream clay arched door standing slightly open with warm gold light spilling out onto sage clay ground
A cream clay water flask and rolled travel blanket on gold clay desert dunes with faint footprints

Lesson 1 · Farah · ages 5-7

How happy Allah is when you return

The Prophet ﷺ described Allah's joy at a person's repentance using a picture a child can feel: someone who lost everything in a desert and found it again.

  1. The lost camel

    The Prophet ﷺ said Allah is more pleased with the repentance of His servant than one of you would be at finding his camel that he had lost in the desert.

  2. Turning back is a gift, not a punishment

    Allah loves those who keep turning back to Him and those who keep themselves clean.

  3. Never think you are too far gone

    Allah tells the servants who wasted much not to despair of His mercy — He forgives all sins.

  4. Say it in your own words

    Tawbah can be said in English by a small child: 'Allah, I am sorry, help me not do it again.'

  5. Do it straight away

    The sooner you turn back, the easier it is; waiting makes a small wrong feel normal.

Surah Al-Baqara · 2:222

وَيَسْـَٔلُونَكَ عَنِ ٱلْمَحِيضِ ۖ قُلْ هُوَ أَذًۭى فَٱعْتَزِلُوا۟ ٱلنِّسَآءَ فِى ٱلْمَحِيضِ ۖ وَلَا تَقْرَبُوهُنَّ حَتَّىٰ يَطْهُرْنَ ۖ فَإِذَا تَطَهَّرْنَ فَأْتُوهُنَّ مِنْ حَيْثُ أَمَرَكُمُ ٱللَّهُ ۚ إِنَّ ٱللَّهَ يُحِبُّ ٱلتَّوَّٰبِينَ وَيُحِبُّ ٱلْمُتَطَهِّرِينَ

Wa yas'aloonaka 'anil maheedi qul huwa azan fa'tazilun nisaaa'a fil maheedi wa laa taqraboo hunna hattaa yathurna fa-izaa tathharna faatoohunna min haisu amarakumul laah; innallaaha yuhibbut Tawwaabeena wa yuhibbul mutatahhireen

“And they ask you about menstruation. Say, "It is harm, so keep away from wives during menstruation. And do not approach them until they are pure. And when they have purified themselves, then come to them from where Allah has ordained for you. Indeed, Allah loves those who are constantly repentant and loves those who purify themselves."”

Surah Az-Zumar · 39:53

۞ قُلْ يَٰعِبَادِىَ ٱلَّذِينَ أَسْرَفُوا۟ عَلَىٰٓ أَنفُسِهِمْ لَا تَقْنَطُوا۟ مِن رَّحْمَةِ ٱللَّهِ ۚ إِنَّ ٱللَّهَ يَغْفِرُ ٱلذُّنُوبَ جَمِيعًا ۚ إِنَّهُۥ هُوَ ٱلْغَفُورُ ٱلرَّحِيمُ

Qul yaa'ibaadiyal lazeena asrafoo 'alaaa anfusihim laa taqnatoo mirrahmatil laah; innal laaha yaghfiruz zunooba jamee'aa; innahoo Huwal Ghafoorur Raheem

“Say, "O My servants who have transgressed against themselves [by sinning], do not despair of the mercy of Allah. Indeed, Allah forgives all sins. Indeed, it is He who is the Forgiving, the Merciful."”

“Allah is more pleased with the repentance of His slave than anyone of you is pleased with finding his camel which he had lost in the desert.”

Sahih al-Bukhari 6309

Do this before next time

Say one short sorry to Allah tonight in your own words, out loud, before you sleep.

Sage clay stepping stones on a cream base with one stone curving back to rejoin the path

Lesson 2 · Khata' · ages 8-11

Everyone slips — the best ones return

Making mistakes is part of being a child of Adam; the measure of a person is what they do next.

  1. The hadith itself

    The Prophet ﷺ said: 'Every son of Adam commits sin, and the best of those who commit sin are those who repent.'

  2. Not an excuse

    'Everyone does it' is not permission — the hadith praises the returning, not the slipping.

  3. The two kinds of people

    Allah describes the good as those who, when they wrong themselves, remember Allah and ask forgiveness.

  4. Do not repeat the excuse-loop

    Saying sorry while planning to do it again is not tawbah; intending to stop is part of it.

  5. Hide your slips, not your repentance

    You do not need to broadcast a private mistake; you do need to fix any harm done to a person.

Surah Aal-i-Imraan · 3:135

وَٱلَّذِينَ إِذَا فَعَلُوا۟ فَٰحِشَةً أَوْ ظَلَمُوٓا۟ أَنفُسَهُمْ ذَكَرُوا۟ ٱللَّهَ فَٱسْتَغْفَرُوا۟ لِذُنُوبِهِمْ وَمَن يَغْفِرُ ٱلذُّنُوبَ إِلَّا ٱللَّهُ وَلَمْ يُصِرُّوا۟ عَلَىٰ مَا فَعَلُوا۟ وَهُمْ يَعْلَمُونَ

Wallazeena izaa fa'aloo faahishatan aw zalamooo anfusahum zakarul laaha fastaghfaroo lizunoobihim; wa mai yaghfiruz zunooba illal laahu wa lam yusirroo 'alaa maa fa'aloo wa hum ya'lamooo

“And those who, when they commit an immorality or wrong themselves [by transgression], remember Allah and seek forgiveness for their sins - and who can forgive sins except Allah? - and [who] do not persist in what they have done while they know.”

Surah At-Tahrim · 66:8

يَٰٓأَيُّهَا ٱلَّذِينَ ءَامَنُوا۟ تُوبُوٓا۟ إِلَى ٱللَّهِ تَوْبَةًۭ نَّصُوحًا عَسَىٰ رَبُّكُمْ أَن يُكَفِّرَ عَنكُمْ سَيِّـَٔاتِكُمْ وَيُدْخِلَكُمْ جَنَّٰتٍۢ تَجْرِى مِن تَحْتِهَا ٱلْأَنْهَٰرُ يَوْمَ لَا يُخْزِى ٱللَّهُ ٱلنَّبِىَّ وَٱلَّذِينَ ءَامَنُوا۟ مَعَهُۥ ۖ نُورُهُمْ يَسْعَىٰ بَيْنَ أَيْدِيهِمْ وَبِأَيْمَٰنِهِمْ يَقُولُونَ رَبَّنَآ أَتْمِمْ لَنَا نُورَنَا وَٱغْفِرْ لَنَآ ۖ إِنَّكَ عَلَىٰ كُلِّ شَىْءٍۢ قَدِيرٌۭ

Yaaa ayyuhal lazeena aammano toobooo ilal laahi tawbatan nasoohan 'asaa rabbukum any-yukaffira 'ankum sayyi aatikum wa yudkhilakum jannaatin tajree min tahtihal anhaaru yawma laa yukhzil laahun nabiyya wallazeena aamanoo ma'ahoo nooruhum yas'aa baina aydeehim wa bi aymaanihim yaqooloona rabbanaaa atmim lanaa nooranaa waghfir lana innaka 'alaa kulli shai'in qadeer

“O you who have believed, repent to Allah with sincere repentance. Perhaps your Lord will remove from you your misdeeds and admit you into gardens beneath which rivers flow [on] the Day when Allah will not disgrace the Prophet and those who believed with him. Their light will proceed before them and on their right; they will say, "Our Lord, perfect for us our light and forgive us. Indeed, You are over all things competent."”

“Every son of Adam commits sin, and the best of those who commit sin are those who repent.”

Sunan Ibn Majah 4251

Do this before next time

Name one habit you slip into most, and write the single change that would stop it.

A gold clay keyhole plate glowing with warm light set into a cream clay panel

Lesson 3 · The door · ages 12-15

How long the door stays open

Allah accepts repentance right up to the last moments of a life — but nobody knows when their last moment is, so the wise do not wait.

  1. Until the final breath

    The Prophet ﷺ said: 'Indeed Allah accepts the repentance of a slave as long as his soul has not reached his throat.'

  2. So why not delay?

    Because you do not know when that moment is — the promise is about Allah's mercy, not about your timing.

  3. The Prophet ﷺ still asked forgiveness

    Abu Hurayrah heard him ﷺ say: 'By Allah, I ask Allah for forgiveness and turn to Him in repentance more than seventy times a day.'

  4. Istighfar is a daily habit

    Say 'Astaghfirullah' between tasks the way you wash your hands — small, often, unremarkable.

  5. Repentance is between you and Allah

    No person stands between a Muslim and Allah's forgiveness; you ask Him directly.

Surah An-Nisaa · 4:17

إِنَّمَا ٱلتَّوْبَةُ عَلَى ٱللَّهِ لِلَّذِينَ يَعْمَلُونَ ٱلسُّوٓءَ بِجَهَٰلَةٍۢ ثُمَّ يَتُوبُونَ مِن قَرِيبٍۢ فَأُو۟لَٰٓئِكَ يَتُوبُ ٱللَّهُ عَلَيْهِمْ ۗ وَكَانَ ٱللَّهُ عَلِيمًا حَكِيمًۭا

Innamat tawbatu 'alallaahi lillazeena ya'maloonas sooo'a bijahaalatin summa yatooboona min qareebin faulaaika yatoobul laahu 'alaihim; wa kaanal laahu 'Aleeman Hakeemaa

“The repentance accepted by Allah is only for those who do wrong in ignorance [or carelessness] and then repent soon after. It is those to whom Allah will turn in forgiveness, and Allah is ever Knowing and Wise.”

Surah An-Nisaa · 4:18

وَلَيْسَتِ ٱلتَّوْبَةُ لِلَّذِينَ يَعْمَلُونَ ٱلسَّيِّـَٔاتِ حَتَّىٰٓ إِذَا حَضَرَ أَحَدَهُمُ ٱلْمَوْتُ قَالَ إِنِّى تُبْتُ ٱلْـَٰٔنَ وَلَا ٱلَّذِينَ يَمُوتُونَ وَهُمْ كُفَّارٌ ۚ أُو۟لَٰٓئِكَ أَعْتَدْنَا لَهُمْ عَذَابًا أَلِيمًۭا

Wa laisatit tawbatu lillazeena ya'maloonas saiyiaati hattaaa izaa hadara ahadahumul mawtu qaala innee tubtul 'aana wa lallazeena yamootoona wa hum kuffaar; ulaaa'ika a'tadnaa lahum 'azaaban aleemaa

“But repentance is not [accepted] of those who [continue to] do evil deeds up until, when death comes to one of them, he says, "Indeed, I have repented now," or of those who die while they are disbelievers. For them We have prepared a painful punishment.”

“Indeed Allah accepts the repentance of a slave as long as his soul has not reached his throat.”

Jami' at-Tirmidhi 3537

“By Allah! I ask for forgiveness from Allah and turn to Him in repentance more than seventy times a day.”

Sahih al-Bukhari 6307

Memorise this

أَسْتَغْفِرُ اللَّهَ

Astaghfirullah

I ask Allah for forgiveness.

Wording of istighfar; the Prophet's ﷺ daily practice, Sahih al-Bukhari 6307

Do this before next time

Say Astaghfirullah ten times after each salah for a week and keep a tally.

Four cream clay steps rising with small gold clay marker balls resting on them against a sage background

Lesson 4 · How to · ages 8-11

The four steps of a real tawbah

A real turning-back has parts a child can count on one hand: feel it, stop it, ask Allah, and put right what you broke.

  1. 1. Mean it

    Regret is the beginning; if you are not sorry, nothing else has started.

  2. 2. Stop doing it

    Tawbah includes leaving the action, not only feeling bad about it.

  3. 3. Ask Allah directly

    Allah invites the believers to turn to Him in sincere repentance.

  4. 4. Fix what you can

    If a person was harmed, return the thing, tell the truth, or apologise to them as well.

  5. Then move on

    Once you have turned back, do not carry the shame around — Allah forgives all sins for those who turn to Him.

Surah At-Tahrim · 66:8

يَٰٓأَيُّهَا ٱلَّذِينَ ءَامَنُوا۟ تُوبُوٓا۟ إِلَى ٱللَّهِ تَوْبَةًۭ نَّصُوحًا عَسَىٰ رَبُّكُمْ أَن يُكَفِّرَ عَنكُمْ سَيِّـَٔاتِكُمْ وَيُدْخِلَكُمْ جَنَّٰتٍۢ تَجْرِى مِن تَحْتِهَا ٱلْأَنْهَٰرُ يَوْمَ لَا يُخْزِى ٱللَّهُ ٱلنَّبِىَّ وَٱلَّذِينَ ءَامَنُوا۟ مَعَهُۥ ۖ نُورُهُمْ يَسْعَىٰ بَيْنَ أَيْدِيهِمْ وَبِأَيْمَٰنِهِمْ يَقُولُونَ رَبَّنَآ أَتْمِمْ لَنَا نُورَنَا وَٱغْفِرْ لَنَآ ۖ إِنَّكَ عَلَىٰ كُلِّ شَىْءٍۢ قَدِيرٌۭ

Yaaa ayyuhal lazeena aammano toobooo ilal laahi tawbatan nasoohan 'asaa rabbukum any-yukaffira 'ankum sayyi aatikum wa yudkhilakum jannaatin tajree min tahtihal anhaaru yawma laa yukhzil laahun nabiyya wallazeena aamanoo ma'ahoo nooruhum yas'aa baina aydeehim wa bi aymaanihim yaqooloona rabbanaaa atmim lanaa nooranaa waghfir lana innaka 'alaa kulli shai'in qadeer

“O you who have believed, repent to Allah with sincere repentance. Perhaps your Lord will remove from you your misdeeds and admit you into gardens beneath which rivers flow [on] the Day when Allah will not disgrace the Prophet and those who believed with him. Their light will proceed before them and on their right; they will say, "Our Lord, perfect for us our light and forgive us. Indeed, You are over all things competent."”

Surah Hud · 11:114

وَأَقِمِ ٱلصَّلَوٰةَ طَرَفَىِ ٱلنَّهَارِ وَزُلَفًۭا مِّنَ ٱلَّيْلِ ۚ إِنَّ ٱلْحَسَنَٰتِ يُذْهِبْنَ ٱلسَّيِّـَٔاتِ ۚ ذَٰلِكَ ذِكْرَىٰ لِلذَّٰكِرِينَ

Wa aqimis Salaata tarafayin nahaari wa zulafam minal layl; innal hasanaati yuzhibnas saiyi aat; zaalika zikraa liz zaakireen

“And establish prayer at the two ends of the day and at the approach of the night. Indeed, good deeds do away with misdeeds. That is a reminder for those who remember.”

Surah Az-Zumar · 39:53

۞ قُلْ يَٰعِبَادِىَ ٱلَّذِينَ أَسْرَفُوا۟ عَلَىٰٓ أَنفُسِهِمْ لَا تَقْنَطُوا۟ مِن رَّحْمَةِ ٱللَّهِ ۚ إِنَّ ٱللَّهَ يَغْفِرُ ٱلذُّنُوبَ جَمِيعًا ۚ إِنَّهُۥ هُوَ ٱلْغَفُورُ ٱلرَّحِيمُ

Qul yaa'ibaadiyal lazeena asrafoo 'alaaa anfusihim laa taqnatoo mirrahmatil laah; innal laaha yaghfiruz zunooba jamee'aa; innahoo Huwal Ghafoorur Raheem

“Say, "O My servants who have transgressed against themselves [by sinning], do not despair of the mercy of Allah. Indeed, Allah forgives all sins. Indeed, it is He who is the Forgiving, the Merciful."”

“Every son of Adam commits sin, and the best of those who commit sin are those who repent.”

Sunan Ibn Majah 4251

Do this before next time

Take one thing you did wrong this week and walk it through all four steps today.

A large soft cream clay cloud gently covering a small gold clay sun against a sage clay sky

Lesson 5 · Rahmah · ages 12-15

Mercy came first

Allah wrote above His Throne that His mercy comes before His anger — the frame every child should hold their mistakes inside.

  1. Written above the Throne

    The Prophet ﷺ said that when Allah had finished His creation He wrote above His Throne: 'My Mercy preceded My Anger.'

  2. Mercy that covers everything

    Allah says His mercy encompasses all things.

  3. Fear and hope together

    A Muslim neither despairs nor takes Allah lightly; both feelings keep each other honest.

  4. Be merciful because you are shown mercy

    The person who wants Allah's forgiveness forgives others their small offences.

  5. This is not a licence

    Knowing Allah is Merciful is a reason to come back quickly, not a reason to keep going.

Surah Al-A'raaf · 7:156

۞ وَٱكْتُبْ لَنَا فِى هَٰذِهِ ٱلدُّنْيَا حَسَنَةًۭ وَفِى ٱلْءَاخِرَةِ إِنَّا هُدْنَآ إِلَيْكَ ۚ قَالَ عَذَابِىٓ أُصِيبُ بِهِۦ مَنْ أَشَآءُ ۖ وَرَحْمَتِى وَسِعَتْ كُلَّ شَىْءٍۢ ۚ فَسَأَكْتُبُهَا لِلَّذِينَ يَتَّقُونَ وَيُؤْتُونَ ٱلزَّكَوٰةَ وَٱلَّذِينَ هُم بِـَٔايَٰتِنَا يُؤْمِنُونَ

Waktub lanaa fee haazi hid dunyaa hasanatanw wa fil Aakhirati innnaa hudnaaa ilaik; qaala 'azaabee useebu bihee man ashaaa'u wa rahmatee wasi'at kulla shai'; fasa aktubuhaa lillazeena yattaqoona wa yu'toonaz Zakaata wallazeena hum bi Aayaatinaa yu'minoon

“And decree for us in this world [that which is] good and [also] in the Hereafter; indeed, we have turned back to You." [Allah] said, "My punishment - I afflict with it whom I will, but My mercy encompasses all things." So I will decree it [especially] for those who fear Me and give zakah and those who believe in Our verses -”

Surah Az-Zumar · 39:53

۞ قُلْ يَٰعِبَادِىَ ٱلَّذِينَ أَسْرَفُوا۟ عَلَىٰٓ أَنفُسِهِمْ لَا تَقْنَطُوا۟ مِن رَّحْمَةِ ٱللَّهِ ۚ إِنَّ ٱللَّهَ يَغْفِرُ ٱلذُّنُوبَ جَمِيعًا ۚ إِنَّهُۥ هُوَ ٱلْغَفُورُ ٱلرَّحِيمُ

Qul yaa'ibaadiyal lazeena asrafoo 'alaaa anfusihim laa taqnatoo mirrahmatil laah; innal laaha yaghfiruz zunooba jamee'aa; innahoo Huwal Ghafoorur Raheem

“Say, "O My servants who have transgressed against themselves [by sinning], do not despair of the mercy of Allah. Indeed, Allah forgives all sins. Indeed, it is He who is the Forgiving, the Merciful."”

“When Allah had finished His creation, He wrote over His Throne: 'My Mercy preceded My Anger.'”

Sahih al-Bukhari 7422

Do this before next time

Forgive one person something small this week, and say why you chose to.

Every ayah on this page comes from the Tanzil Uthmani text of the Qur'an with the Sahih International translation, and every hadith carries its collection and number so you can check it yourself. Back to the learning path

Next on this shelf: Everyday adab — 6 lessons.

1-to-1 lessons

Go deeper into tawbah & allah's mercy

A teacher can answer your child's questions properly, check their understanding, and take this further at their own pace.

Book a tutor for this